RandomThoughts

Day 2531 It's been a pleasant change, actually did something this weekend. In all honesty it was a very busy week. More outings than I'm used to. In my early twenties I used to go out 4/5 times a week and now I just about go once and that's only to break up my week. It's been quite a change, I really no longer have the stamina to walk around shops, and the like. My legs by the end of it are destroyed. Honestly.

But you know some stretching the night before and in the morning really help with the blood flow. Today I'm getting the urge again to go out and enjoy this really good weather we're having but we'll see.

#Chapter25

Day Naught Where do we go from here? Our life was filled with passion and excitement Only for the rug to be pulled Things have died down And I'm stuck here holding on Am I the crazy one You know for not moving past it Whilst you hold it down. Am I the crazy one To have moved on Whilst you complain of neglect. What did you expect From this sort of ending Did you not foresee this coldness From back then Or did you want your cake and eat it.

#TalesOfTheInbetween

Day 2530 It's been a struggle at times. Writing that is. I know I keep going on about the same nonsense. I feel like my writings of yesteryears was definitely more upbeat and positive. Whereas more recently it's like all I do is complain about something. I don't want to be that guy, I don't want to be depressed with no life. But alas, I am. I've been unwell as of late and I've had to work, never thought I'd be that guy. Mostly what I do is watch TV after work, never thought I'd be that guy. I've become so dry and boring. I honestly need to kickstart myself into gear. Let's just chalk it up to a long winter with its short days.

I'll try to be more productive this summer.

#Chapter25

Day 2529 It's difficult. You have an idea, this concept rattling around in your mind but you can never put it into action. What is it...do you think too big and too fast? Getting carried away and try to flesh it out. Or is it the fear of failure holding you back? The reality of you're actually not great or anything special at all, holding you back.

It's tough. The first step is scary, and unfathomable. You're happy for the ones who put it out there in the world, as you're unable to do so. It's hard. You're comfortable. That's never going to change is it. Even when life was tough. You couldn't do anything about it.

#Chapter25

Day unknown It's cold here. I don't know where to turn anymore. I can't see beyond my hands. I can't hear you. Speak to me someone. My heart hurts. I can't breath This pain is too much for me I can't scream They watch me Dark and growling From my bed I hear them They're waiting for me They're waiting Pls Help me

#TalesOfTheInbetween

Day Naught. Happiness. How do you deal with it? Do you kind it with kindness or ignore it? Do you embrace it or fight it? Happiness? What's that you might ask You don't acknowledge it nor do you accept it It could never come to me as it looks into your eyes How can I be happy when my life is like this Sometimes it's the little things But there's no point explaining it to you For you can't experience it.

#TalesOfTheInbetween

Day 2528 Growing responsibilities suck. Honestly really suck. I was thinking about how vastly my life has changed over the last 10 years and it is insane. I now have rent, bills for a small token of freedom. Grow up and move out they said. It'll be good for you they said. That freedom just ties you down and you end up paying someone else's mortgage or being another stream of income for a bank. Now I'm not saying leech off of your parents but I'm saying be patient and don't rush into things.

When you're in your early 20s you want to rush and get ahead in life but I look back and think was it worth it. We all need money ofc but is the stress worth it. Sacrificing everything around you just to work doesn't seem like a good deal and I don't even work that hard. I've seen some people around who spent 90% of their day working. Just because there's nothing else to do.

It's sad I suppose but honestly I wish to make the next 10 years of my life fruitful. I rather be happy and healthy and enjoy my time even if it's wasting away watching TV. I shudder to think that I'll be waking up tired to go to work a job which I dislike, a life where friends and family was a focus but now I barely have time to rest.

#Chapter25

Day 2527 I'm in disbelief really. March is coming to an end. I know we all keep saying how quickly time is flying but damn February and March have breezed by. I couldn't even tell you what happened. Life is passing by so quickly and I'm actually over it. I feel like I've entered the boring phase of my life. People expect you to be doing stuff and adulting but like I'm over it. I want to be lazy after work and waste my days away.

Maybe that's why my days are fleeting....

#Chapter25

Day Naught. Worse off. I think I'm the good one, always trying to make peace. The one who apologises first. I'm ok with doing that, I tend not to get angry or annoyed often but it happens, we're human. But why do I attract the moody ones. The frustrated ones. Perhaps I'm like that too. Unable to express myself when I'm upset or angry. But I try. Unlike the other side of the wall. Just shut off until it blows over. Over nothing either just some pettiness. How are you supposed to live with it forever. I suppose you just do. Those moments are fleeting. Between all the good ones. Egg shells get pretty tiring to walk upon.

#TalesOfTheInbetween