Day 2524
Life truly has a habit of kicking you in the nuts unexpectedly, and then giving you immense relief. It's a struggle at times no doubt, the emotion have a field day and plan to ruin your day. Then there's the humans who try to ruin you. Self interest runs rampant. They get upset at you when you have their energy. Then the tests come after that to guage your reaction. It's a shitty situation but that's where your emotions need to be under control. But mine were not in that moment but I handled it better than last time.
Sometimes you have malicious ways to deal with it but it's better to let it go and be normal. An unbothered attitude is the best attitude one can argue. Especially when it isn't that deep. Stoop to their level. But there's no need to go further.
#Chapter25
Day Naught.
Change.
We want you to change for the better.
We value self improvement and self growth.
We will support you and help you.
Change.
No way.
We can't believe you changed.
Who are you.
We liked you better before.
We don't like this new you.
You think you're better than us.
#TalesOfTheInbetween
Day 2523
Where do you go from here.
You've got a lot to achieve and a long way to go.
But it feels difficult at times and you just want to give up.
We've gotten too comfortable with your life.
Safe job.
Safe house.
Safe life.
#Chapter25
Day 2522
Don't you find it enjoyable.
When it all comes together.
The moment. The time.
The feeling of greatness.
Sike.
We're all on the cusp of nothingness.
Born to be forgotten.
Our achievements lost to time.
Left in the darkness.
#Chapter25
Day 2521
I feel clearer. I feel better. I feel slightly refreshed but honestly for the first time in a long time I don't feel shit or down in the dumps. I'm not sure what's different but I don't feel hazed and I just overall feel healthier. Earlier in the day I felt like shit, didn't sleep enough and was tired. When I got home from work same thing just tired. But now I don't know what changed. I just feel alive.
#Chapter25
Day 2521
Tiredness.
I feel it in my bones.
In my soul.
From the core to the floor.
The feeling of being out of it in the thick of it.
Barely conscious.
But there's no forgiving it.
We all feel it.
But there's no mercy toward it.
No excuses or acceptance for not getting our 8 hours.
Mocked for sleeping early but reprimand for our tired mistakes.
Good ol' tiredness.
You gotta hate it.
#Chapter25
Day 2520
So end of another week and another month. As cliche as it is time truly moves quickly. Like I can't tell you where the last 2 months went and we're approaching April like a muthafucker. Like how are we don't with Feb already when January dragged along so much.
It's bittersweet when time flies, like I'm happy for payday and the like but hate how quickly things move. I'm lost for time and can barely do feel productive. Is life simply just coasting me by.
Is it something you need to snap out of in order to do something real and serious. This weekend for the first time in ages felt productive/slow and all in the same breath past by quickly. It's all rather confusing this whole time concept.
#Chapter25
Day 2519
Sometimes, you just have to be big enough to say sorry. We get in our own little worlds and minds and we neglect everything else around us.
We, develop such a me Vs the world mentality and carry it everywhere with us. We can't see the grass from the trees. We can't see those who are willing to help us. Lift us. Carry us along the way. In the end it was I who achieved this feat.
Live. You know really live with those around you. Don't get upset or angry over petty shit. Really be the bigger man. Kill your ego, we really don't need that. Now I'm not saying be a pushover or be walked upon. But be kind to those you love, and admire. They're the only ones deserving of your kindness. So pucker down and admit defeat more often. You can't lose if they're sincerely happy.
#Chapter25
Day Naught.
I hate being cold. Just be normal with me and I'll be normal back. It's not hard it's just decency. If you don't wanna talk then that's cool too just let me know. Stop putting me in this limbo of annoyance. Perhaps it's my fault. I have to cut off the world in order to save myself from being cut. Back to the fake smiles and hurried glances. You know what you lost. It's still somehow my fault.
#TalesOfTheInbetween
Day Naught.
Falling.
I am
But not like the way you think I am.
Deep seated
But spiriling out of control.
Sinking deeper
Into this abyss that I call my mind.
Sprawling into darkness
Forever loosing myself.
I am.
Falling.
#TalesOfTheInbetween