Ahhh I was supposed to write something yesterday but got my days mixed up thinking I already did. That's my bad, I should take better care of my writing. We've just past the half way mark and no I'm no closer to writing my first book as I was 5 years ago when the ideas first came trickling down. I don't know what it is but seems like I always put everything before it.

It's probably down to a fear of failing. It sucks but I should and have to push through it. Which is easier said than done. I feel like I always talk about pushing through but always fail to do so. I just need space and time to filter through the bullshit.

#TalesOfTheInbetween

Two days in a row. Who am I Stephen King!

In all seriousness been a busy fucking morning here in the thunderdome, as I drop the kids to the pool it allows me some breathing room to chill and reflect on things.

Life has been busy at work and outside of work. Have been really getting into the flow with some non-work projects and finally I have begun working on my homelab! Granted I have yet to build it and all the parts are here as of a couple of days ago. I need to start putting that shit together – I'm just concerned about the bios versions and the CPU gen.

Other than that I've started to take my health seriously again and begun the journey of eating better, smaller and working out more consistently. So in reality everything is sort of falling into it's painful place and I'm hoping this does also now. Just gotta find the time to do so.

But yeah those are some of the tales from the beyond.

#TalesOfTheInbetween

Hi don't know why I can't commit myself to writing. It's getting a bit absurd thinking about it. I went from writing regularly then to not at all in the space of a couple of weeks. I tried to get back into the swing of things but honestly it just failed miserably.

I've been really busy outside of work which has been contributing to this lack of time but even then it's just an excuse. I need to pick a routine that works for me and you know, just stick to it.

So here we go and let's try to reset this thing for the 200th time.

#TalesOfTheInbetween

Again. You know I do this. Again. Over and over. Again.
I build up so much momentum. Again. For it to come crumbling down. Again. I'll say I'll be consistent. Again.
But it just keeps failing, all over. Again. Let us start. Again. And hope this time we make it through it all. Again.

#TalesOfTheInbetween

Lost. Lost in time. Where does it go, I was supposed to update this a while go But I lost myself and lost my time. Before I know it's been a month with some change to go But honestly I need to get a grip for I don't know where I'll stick I need to refocus myself on the things that matter. You never know when it'll all just scatter.

#TalesOfTheInbetween

Time. I feel like I never have enough of it. Like I had more when I was younger, a lot more free time when I was alone, endless summers. The 24 felt like something real. You felt each minute of the day.

Then you start working. Start cohabitating. The things you when you're broke and alone. But it's the natual trade-off. Less alone time and more together time. No more summer holidays just 20 days of leave.

After all that it just goes back. Endless alone time with endless summers. Unable to move like you used to but you have your peace and quiet. More broke and less responsibility but time counts down.

Until you're no more.

#TalesOfTheInbetween

Day Naught Where do we go from here? Our life was filled with passion and excitement Only for the rug to be pulled Things have died down And I'm stuck here holding on Am I the crazy one You know for not moving past it Whilst you hold it down. Am I the crazy one To have moved on Whilst you complain of neglect. What did you expect From this sort of ending Did you not foresee this coldness From back then Or did you want your cake and eat it.

#TalesOfTheInbetween

Day unknown It's cold here. I don't know where to turn anymore. I can't see beyond my hands. I can't hear you. Speak to me someone. My heart hurts. I can't breath This pain is too much for me I can't scream They watch me Dark and growling From my bed I hear them They're waiting for me They're waiting Pls Help me

#TalesOfTheInbetween

Day Naught. Happiness. How do you deal with it? Do you kind it with kindness or ignore it? Do you embrace it or fight it? Happiness? What's that you might ask You don't acknowledge it nor do you accept it It could never come to me as it looks into your eyes How can I be happy when my life is like this Sometimes it's the little things But there's no point explaining it to you For you can't experience it.

#TalesOfTheInbetween