Day 401 I often find myself coming back to this place when I feel lost or adrift, it's the place where I can come and attempt to clear my thoughts in an empty place. It's become sort of a safe haven for me to sort through my feelings and start again.
I find myself again, on the precipice of depression and bored. Where life becomes black and white and void of life. But I am handling it a lot better than I have in the past where I've just let it overcome me and left me empty without reason.
But we move as the kids say nowadays, I am trying to kickstart my life and move into action, begin starting projects and actually do work toward them instead of planning and planning then avoiding any meaningful and watch the months go by then being washed over with depression. A vicious cycle that I'm stuck adamant on breaking out of. Or so I keep telling myself, maybe this time will be different, something feels different within myself. But alas, only time will tell whether it's just another fleeting feeling of nothingness or action will be drawn from it.
I do have to admit, my outlook on things has most certainly matured in respect to life goals, business and what I which to achieve. I'm no longer naive or overly optimistic about things and tend now to think things through as opposed to before. I understand the value of just doing things and planning as opposed to just planning till kingdom-come.
But as I said; we'll see, as I grow wary of myself, increasingly so as I get older.